Mmkay, lotsa stuff today. First: I've been switched from Zoloft to Prozac. We'll see if that makes a difference.
Second: I tried to cut myself yesterday.
Third: I shadowed at a private catholic school today because I've been thinking of transferring. (A bit of background~ my current school is quite homophobic and I am rather attracted to girls and would rather not have to hide this fact forever, I have few friends there, I get teased a lot, and for the past month or so my friend has been calling me ugly or a loser and pointing out every little unattractive thing about me every single time she sees me, so I'd rather not go into that but yeah it's pretty fucking hurtful.) So I followed this girl, Belle (who was really nice and pretty), around to all her classes and hung out and saw what went on. It was pretty awkward at first, but then during her first period Belle let me read her journal of poetry and I learned quite a lot about her, and then we passed notes back and forth as I asked questions about the school and stuff that I was too awkward to ask aloud, and I met a couple other people who I had met through another friend so they recognized me and I ate lunch with them.
Overall, it seemed like a very nice place to be and everyone was pretty friendly, the teachers and everything seemed good, and I love the uniforms. I ~think~ I could make friends there, buuuut yeah.
The main problem I have with it is the fact that it's catholic, and they had all these cheesy posters up that I can't take seriously. (I'm an atheist, btw.) And the religion class is mandatory all four years, and I just feel like that would be really awkward. They made us say who we were praying for, and I was just like lolwtf. But I guess I could deal with that, as it seems there are a good portion of students of different faiths so I guess they all just go along with it.
The other major thing is that it's all girls, which I guess is nice because everyone can be themselves a bit more, but it's a problem for me because I don't exactly /want/ to like girls, and without the presence of guys (or rather, the one guy I like) to keep me distracted, I'm afraid I'll only get more attracted to them. Especially since everyone's in those catholic schoolgirl uniforms with skirts and stuff.
Think that's it, though I may have forgotten something.
Oh yeah, the other school has lunch for a full period, whereas my school's lunch is only 25 minutes. We actually had time to eat and have a conversation. Twas nice.